Posts Tagged ‘pity party’

When you throw yourself a pity party, your only enemy is yourself. When you play the victim, your only predator is you. You are within reach to help yourself. Stop making excuses and stop being afraid of true healing. You are your only limitation; you are the only person in the way.


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When we are wallowing in our own self doubt, fears, and wants, we end up throwing ourselves a pity party. Having a pity party is like falling into a really deep well. It’s dark all around you, completely empty, and getting out of the well seems hopeless. The more we wallow, the harder it is to see the light above us. Not only are we stuck in the well, but we also drag other people down into our well and they, in turn, join us in our pity party.

Little is accomplished during a pity party. Even less is accomplished when someone pity’s the pity partier. Someone in a pity party does not need encouragement to stay where they are. Do not enable someone in a pity party, motivate them to move.

Jesus asks us to act. When Jesus encountered a pity partier he spoke hope into their life by challenging them with action.

In luke 19:3-5
Zaccheus was a short man who wanted to see Jesus but he couldn’t see because of the crowd. So he climbed a tree to see Jesus. I don’t know what Zaccheus was thinking in this moment but I know that If it were me I would be angry that I was so short and I couldn’t do what I wanted. I would climb that tree with pride, I would think “fine, I’ll climb this tree, I can figure it out on my own and I’ll make myself taller however I can” the tree would be my well. But Jesus didn’t allow this. He told Zaccheus to get down immediately. Jesus is asking him to step out of his well and come back to reality.

In John 4, we don’t know what the woman at the well was thinking. But we learn as Jesus talks to her that she has no husband. She has had five husbands in the past and the man she is with currently is not one of them. I can imagine how bitter I would have felt if I were her. Maybe in that moment she was thinking about how much her life sucked and maybe she was blaming every body else for it. Jesus asks her to give him a drink of the water. Jesus is asking her to serve Him which, in turn, would place her focus on Him instead of herself.

In John 8 a bunch of pharisees bring a woman caught in the act of adultery in front of Jesus, they plan on stoning her to death for her sin. What do you think she was thinking about? I would be wallowing in my guilt and I might even feel like I deserved the punishment. But Jesus tells the Pharisees that the person who has not sinned should throw the first stone and they all walk away leaving just the woman and Jesus. Jesus tells the woman that he does not condemn her and then says to her “go now and leave your life of sin.” Jesus is telling the woman to abandon the lifestyle she was living and start fresh.

Step out of your well, serve others, and change your attitude and actions.

Even if we manage to get out, focusing on ourselves will bring us back down in to that well. And there is no substance to our serving if we have the wrong attitude. If we are continuing to live the life that brought us down in the first place, we will fall back in to our well. There are a number of ingredients that make the recipe for a pity party. It is important to start every day by talking to Jesus. He will remind us that we are His. He will remind us that caring what the world thinks is pointless. He will remind us that He has got in under control. We need to give him our fears, our failures, our insecurities, our dreams, our hopes, and our treasures. We do not have to live a life of self pity, we are meant for much more than that.

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